Premarital Counseling

Marriage is a mosaic you build with your spouse. Millions of tiny moments that creates your love story.

Jennifer Smith

A typical wedding requires a lot of preparation. But what kind of time and attention is the marriage itself getting in the days before your very big day? Participating in premarital counseling is an excellent way to prepare for—and begin—a lifetime of learning about each other. Generally, premarital counseling occurs in six (6) one-hour sessions. In the event of time or travel constraints, we can also complete the counseling in three (3) two-hour sessions. I am trained as a Prepare and Enrich counselor. The Prepare and Enrich program is designed to get you thinking and talking about your relationship. How does the process work? Each of you will complete an online inventory about the significant issues in marriage. Your individual inventories are then compiled and a report is given to you as a couple.* Your report will highlight relationship strengths as well as areas for growth. Every relationship has areas to grow in and when you talk openly and honestly with each other you have the ability to improve your relationship and grow in understanding. The assessment shows us which areas need very little attention and which areas need more. We will pick four to five areas that most interest you as a couple. Typically, I find that the top areas couples choose are communication, conflict resolution, sexuality/affection, family/friends, and financial management. Of course each relationship is unique and I want to focus on areas that will benefit you most.

The areas assessed in the inventory are:

• Communication
• Conflict Resolution
• Roles in Marriage
• Sexuality / Affection
• Financial Management
• Spiritual Beliefs
• And So Much More

Communication

Communication in any relationship is a skill that can always be improved upon. Learning to listen and respond well—in ways that respect our spouses and benefit an intimate marriage—is an art form one never stops learning. Good communication is foundational and will enhance your marriage relationship for many years to come.

Conflict Resolution

Conflict Resolution is absolutely necessary to ensure a team effort in your relationship. Learning this skill helps build a healthy foundation that will grow and evolve as your marriage grows and evolves. Resolving issues in kind and healthy ways helps maintain a thriving and grace-filled intimacy between the two of you.

Roles in Marriage

What roles do you each want to hold in your relationship? What role do you expect your spouse to carry out? Do you know if you agree on these? The Prepare and Enrich inventory gives you a clear picture on where you land regarding role definitions and expectations, and whether or not the two of you are in agreement regarding roles.

Sexuality / Affection

Sexuality / Affection is a topic that demands a lot of discussion between a newly married couple. What are your sexual expectations of marriage? What are your particular views about sex? What does it mean to pursue true physical intimacy? The ability to talk openly and comfortably with each other about your expectations, your histories, and your desires will be extremely beneficial for your marriage. Creating a positive foundation of physical intimacy and open discussion is crucial for a life of pleasure together.

Financial Management

Money, and how to manage, spend, and save it, can be a stressful topic for any marriage, not just a new one. Determining the meaning of money and how the two of you will combine and manage your finances creates a positive and sturdy foundation on which to build a lifetime of shared resources and mutual priorities.

Spiritual Beliefs

Spiritual Beliefs can be a huge strength or a profound source of tension for any couple. Questions regarding what God intends in and for marriage, as well as your expectations as to how your particular marriage and family will implement your faith, are extremely important. Your spiritual journey is a crucial topic to consider in premarital counseling.

And So Much More

There are many more topics (i.e., relationship dynamics, family backgrounds, personality traits and habits, relationships with family and friends) that may enter into our premarital counseling discussion. Deciding to join your life to another in marriage is one of the most important and exciting decisions you will ever make. Meeting with a trained counselor who brings significant life experience to this process helps set you on a strong foundation for your life together. I have done premarital counseling with many couples in many stages of life, including formal counseling sessions as well as mentoring relationships that my husband and I have participated in together. As a person who has been married more than 30 years, I bring a wealth of experience that goes far beyond book learning. I would be deeply honored to walk through this exciting time of marriage preparation with you. *There is a cost of the Prepare and Enrich inventory and report. This cost is on top of my hourly premarital counseling fee.